You're amazing.

{if he's meant fr you, he'll come back/}

Tuesday10:08 PM

Time for an update. maybe i should really start updating bout him. i didnt rly update bout him thz few time i met him. as i dont wanna get my hope up too high, and ended up getting crush, again. i remember when he left me on the 14th,and he gave me happy news. i was so freaking happy that i blogged bout it on the spot. and guess wht, he crushed my hopes all over again, and yes..... all those things i typed in my blog, all those happy thoughts just remain as a ... thoughts......and it ended up in my draft....up till now.

so yes................lets start updating. its gg 5 months he left me. strong gurl is me. ok no. but aniways, i have been speding my time all over agin with him. meeting him after he book out, anticipating meetups with him, spending times with him on weekends, and sending him fr his book in..............

yes, its back to all those routine. 23rd jan..... that gurl went over to australia for a one week holiday. yes, so what does that mean? that mean that he'll be meeting now and then during the one week. obviusly i was happy, as tht just mean i can spent my time with him. so we met one day after she left........... nothing happen between us tht time. like no sign of smthing gonna happen or something. we met, ate, spent time till 11pm and off he went back to his camp. i didnt expect anything. a few days after that, we met.....on sunday....

and guess what guise, just guess it. ok yes, you got it right. oh before that, we otp-ed the day before and he said 'give me some time to sort things out, in the meanwhile, stop contacting guys pls' so............................yes.

met him the next day, and he actually kneel down infrnt of me, and repeatedly saying sorry, and yes asked fr a patch up. yes the thng which im finally waiting for. 4 months plus i waited fr tht moment, and it finally happend. he ask fr a patch up, and finally admit that he wasnt happy wif her. she was too clingy. she didnt listen to him like how i did. she goes against him like how i dont. she thz she that. all the imperfections and flaws. he even said tht 'remember when you curse me? its true' well........ i once remembered saying tht he wont be happy with her, and she will never understand him. thts not a curse thou sigh

i was happy, really happy when i knw tht i was maybe better thn her. i was happy knowing that he's coming back. i was happy cos he regretted leaving me. all those 1 yr 2 months is not gone to waste.

look how happy i was hahahha k no but yes. so after he told me bout everythng, the only thng i told him was to decide only after he have rightfully 'left' that girl. so yup. and so.................. we were under my blk, and so......... we terserempak wif my uncle. sigh. but guess wht la guess. thy salam each other and my uncle even smiled. sigh.

so..... coincidently tht day was izzat birthday. and he decided to tag along. crazy idea it is, but idk. when he met my aunt, uncle, mum, everyone didnt say anythng and even offer him food. sigh. negative or positive, we both hv no idea. sigh.

overheard my mum conversation the other day to my brother 'aliff tu bukannya jahat. dia tak kurang ajar, dia tau repsect org tua. tapi satu je la, dia tak jujur'

now i knw whts stopping them fr blessing him to be wif me. rly hv no idea how to ..... convince them

i swear i rly wanna be with him thou. alot of pple asked me to rly think it over. like if he can do it once, why cant he do it again. idk, but i dun hv thz thoughts......i mean, eveyone deserve a second chance. and if he will to do it again, insyaAllah akan ade karmanya. one wont be happy cheating forever. and knowing him, idk, i just hv tht faith tht he wont do it again. tht he promised me. my life is coming near to perfect now. slowly it is. all i need is him to work on thz rs, and show me tht he is really scared of losing me. show me tht thz rs can go really far. really2 far like how we intended it to be. insyaAllah

im definitely not looking for a boyfriend with a so handsome looks, muscular body, tall guys and all. nope im not. im just looking for that average guy who really know how to take care of me, understand wht i rly want, not neglecting me. gg on a simple dinner date, a heart-to-heart talk every few days, a every night phone calls or text. just thz simple small things. and he, muhd aliff haidar, he definitely fits tht criteria. the only one who can really understand me, and will never neglect me despite hw busy he is. thz small little thngs which make me keep on falling for him.

{January updatesss/}

Friday9:02 AM

So hey, lets welcome the new month which is february guiseee. Well, I guess I haven’t been updating for a long time, cos you know blogger sucks like out of sudden it sucks! L to upload a photo, we have to change it into a link. And to do that, its like taking lots of my time and patience….. meh.

Ok wtver to that. So, leggo how’s my life. Btw how did I celebrate my new year? Hahahahha after 4 years of not celebrating wif my family, finally celebrated with them thz year, :”) so yes met them all at vivo city. And apparently tht was aman asmar izzat first time. And guess wht, even my brother join us hahahah. Cos normally fr new yr,I’ll be with my friends, and he be with his fiancé or friends.

So while eating at seah imm, saw most of azrul close friends, and have a short chat wif azrul. Ahahhaha annoying shit ths guy. He went out on a date with thz girl on tht day as well. And I was like ‘eh tu kan kwn kau nye matae? Yg bdk kendarat?’ and he said yes. So I said ‘eh drg da break? Drg macam sweet gile je bile time kendarat?’ hhhahahha he answered ‘drg asyik gaduh. So when drg gadoh and he ignored her, another guy came and comfort her. And that guy is me. So never leave your gf alone when she need you’ hahahahhaa annoying.

So yep went to watch the fireworks at the vivo rooftop. Three firework view in total. Perfect. Who said you need a bf/grf to have a perfect strt to ur new year? No. but yes was kinda jealous seeing all those couples kissing during the forework, but oh well. He did that with her at tht mmnt. So……ok whatever....

ok, so schl have strted, mundane. Mundane. Haven’t been skipping schl, but have been waking up late instead. Ha ha ha. Ut2 have started. And it’s a disaster. i swear. on a brighter note, year one will end in less than 2 weeks time.

oh so the other day, went over to thz newly open restaurant at geylang which sells itik. the price there is very expensive. and....the itik is.... hahahah idk, its too slimy and 'geli' fr me. but the environemnt is very cosy.

Annoying aman sure do learn alot from me hahahaha

Met bestf on the first week of jan. finally! Hahahahha so many story shared with her, I felt calmer and …. Blessed. I love her, and sometimes I asked myself why does she have to have curfews or why isn’t she in the same schl as me. Or why don’t we stay near to each other. Despite all that, she still try her best to be thr fr me thru watsapp. :”)

Met her fr the second time fr her rp open hse, with azimah. Hahahahha and I was lectured by azimah along the way as to why I quited tp, why I reject this, why never move on, why I never accept him and all. Hahahahha.

met shermit fr lunch. saw tanesh. saw ho yong and had a short chat. ahhhh i miss my fuchun friends alot.....

Met bestf, ayrie fr movie last weekend. So we watched taxi taxi. And amazingly its a good show. Well, as long as there’s mark lee and gurmit, it’l be funny! So it was his treat,sigh. We headed over for ice cream at mcd later night cos I hv been craving fr ice cream hahahah. And we didn’t realised its alr past 12 midnight. Lucky he drive on tht day. Hais, most of my friends have grown up have car license and stuff. What about me? Gg 20 yet im still chilling with my life. Bad myra bad

And yes guys yes, im finally receiving my bursary money. only god knows how much im really in need of the money.

been spending lots and lots of quality time with family and le aunt family. the one who make me happy without evern trying. listen to my rants 24/7 and scold me unendlessly.

hasnt been gg out wif my friends that much as schl have strted and.....i hv got no money yet, yes. there were times i met with up with some people.

last few weeks, hahahha me and filza were really confident bout finding a job. so we went over to lil india fr a telemaketer thingy, and afterwards went over to bugis fr a beauty...promoter? and we both were like thinking its a different job. so upon reaching there, we just felt like running away. cos. hahahha thts the place we both have been before. and obviusly hv no interest in it? and guess wht la guize, we had to hear them talking frm 8pm till 11pm. yes....that long har har hais

met up with thz guy i hv been contacting wif. we headed over to jp as i was craving fr ljs. and then decided to just lepak-ed around my block. on top of that, he will have to listen to all my rants. met up with her fr the second time days after that. since we both were bored, we decided to just .... meet and talk. yup, and yes someone who definitely can entertain me. xie xiek

met up with haba last few days. thz girl is attached now. congrats and last long pew pew. went over to jp (again?) wif her. she was finding fr a suitable gift fr her bf's birthday. so we took hourssss to finally found one. hahahha but had a great laugh wif her. and yes finally she was the first one i finally gt to meet to rant bout ... everything.

oh yes 27th jan was my annoying cuzin birthday. heheh happy 14th! so we went to celebrate it at habib! why, i havent get money yet. hais. if not can go swensen or something..............
neverthless, i love him. thanks fr always, always entertaining me heheh.

k la i know the cake like girlish right............cos..........i..........chose.......whatttttt janji sedap ok.

tbh right guize............ i really dk wht i hv been doing on january hahahaha, my life is more of a gg to schl, meetup with people, makan, home and sleep kind of routine? yes. aniways, end it off with ..... my face la heheh insyaAllah february gonna be a great one <3 p="">